High Stakes War
by Smarvin
Summary: When Cartman leads the boys in a plan to blackmail the girls, they end up getting much more than what they expected.
1. Chapter 1: Imposing Threat

**My next story. :) Don't expect updates as quickly as last time. If you think that I'm taking to long to update, let me know. R+R!**

**Disclaimer: I (unfortunately) don't own South Park or anything else referenced. Smarv out!**

Cartman P.O.V.

"Well, it looks like everyone is here. Let's begin."

I look around my basement. It appears that everyone responded to the urgent message that I sent out. Good. All eighteen of them need to hear this.

"Now before we start, does anybody have any questions?" I look around and an not surprised to see Butter's hand shoot up. "What, Butters?"

"Why does it have to be so dark in here, Eric?" he asks while playing with his hands nervously.

"We can't let anybody know what we're doing."

"But can't we just open the shades on the window—"

"God damn it Butters, if you're just going to be scared of the dark the whole time then get out here."

He sighs nervously but doesn't leave. I continue my speech.

"Now, I'm sure you're all wondering why I called you all here. As I'm sure you all remember, we all formed a club last year. One where we all gave an oath to fight for the club's principles in order to make the world a better place. I am talking, of course, about G.R.O.S.S.— Getting Rid Of Stupid Subhumans."

"The only reason we joined was because our first club mission was to hack the Scientologist bank account so that all of the members could get 100 dollars every month for being a member," Craig said in his usual monotone.

"And that money continued to arrive in your mailbox," I respond. "This club has done so much for this world already— we stole money from the Scientologists, we forced the gingers to sign a non-aggression treaty which won't end until," I look at my watch. "Oh shit, that ended last week. Anyways, I have a plan that will bring in even more money AND take out an imposing subhuman threat. I am of course talking about taking on the South Park girls."

Everyone immediately starts arguing. Some are for going against the girls, others are against it.

"What makes you think that we could get money from the girls? And since when are they a threat?" Kyle asks, going against my idea like usual.

"Just let me explain, Kahl. You see, the girls have this Congress of some sorts. I have footage of one of these sessions that will answer both of your questions."

I pull over a cart with my TV on it and turn it on. I put a tape inside and fast forward to a certain point.

"Now, I must warn you, this video is top secret and some of you may find it what you see disturbing."

_(Onscreen: The fourth grade girls are in the same room from when they made the lists. Bebe is at the far wall at a podium. Two girls, Red and Wendy, are sitting in front of her. The rest of the girls are sitting across from each other against the two side walls.)_

"I hereby call this session of the South Park Girl Congress to order. First order of business: Wendy, how is the school president campaign going?" Bebe says to the assembled girls.

"In order for us to remain in control of the student government, I estimate that we will need 37 more votes. I am requesting 22,000 dollars from the treasury for the buying of votes, paying people to keep quiet, and general campaign expenses," Wendy answers.

Red responds, "22,000 dollars will be granted to the campaign fund immediately. Keep us informed on whether or not you need more. It is imperative that Cartman does not win this election. We need to remain in power if we want to get control."

"Okay, next order of business. Milly, has the order come in yet?" Bebe asks one of the girls on the side.

"It has indeed arrived and I have placed the goods in the weaponry," the Southern girl responds.

"Good. Now, just a reminder, the weapons are only to be used when we are in a state of emergency or when the Congress has deemed it necessary to fight the boys—"

I turn off the TV and look at the people sitting around the table. The room is dead silent. I address the crowd.

"As you can see here, we have a situation on our hands. If I hadn't planted the camera, God only knows what could happen. We need to take action. I have formed a plan that will prevent whatever they are doing and bring in more money."

"Has the club's high council approved this plan?" Token asks.

"Yes. They have. It was Stan's idea to plant a camera because he wanted revenge for the breakup with Wendy. I showed the tape to Stan and Clyde and formed a plan. We all voted yes on it, so I will now inform you all on it," I answer.

"W...wh...whu...what is it, Eric?" Jimmy asks.

"It's basically a plan for extortion. We tell the girls that we know about their money stockpiles and weaponry. We will demand that they give them to us. If they disagree, we harm one of their members. Not real badly, but we will continue doing it with more and more severity until they give in. We will then put some of the money into my election fund to prevent Wendy from winning. Everything else will go to the club. Any questions?" I ask.

Nobody has any questions, so I start the vote.

"Now, if you vote no and the plan passes, you are bound by club rules to take part in the plan. Now, obviously, Stan, Clyde, and I have all voted yes already. Butters?"

"I vote yes!"

"Kyle?"

"I… I really think we do need to do something. Yes."

"Timmy?"

"Timmah timmah!"

"I'll take that as a yes."

And so it continues. Kenny. Tweek. Token. Craig. Scott Malkinson. All yes. Jimmy, Francis, DogPoo, Jason, and Bradley all agree. Damien, Kevin, and Pip allow the plan to pass, 19 for and zero against.

"It is hereby my duty to make sure that G.R.O.S.S. Operation Tranquility Restoration is carried out successfully."


	2. Chapter 2: First Blood

**Author's Note: R+R! Also: I in no way agree with Cartman's sexist beliefs. Smarv out!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or anything else referenced in this story.**

**Cartman P.O.V.**

"Alright people, target is approaching!" Token whispered.

"Prepare for attack," I say.

Yesterday afternoon after the meeting in my basement we started to finalize our extortion plans. We plotted who, where, when, and how we would attack. After figuring that out, we made a video recording to leave at the scene for the girls so that they knew what we wanted from them.

This morning we sent a scouting team, consisting of Kenny, Craig, and Jason, to figure out where our target would be.

Now the attack team, consisting of Token, Stan, Jimmy, and I, are lying in a bush in front of Esther's house. She has left her house in order to grab the mail. Just as we predicted.

"Wait for my order," I whisper. "Wait for it." She is within ten feet. "Wait for it." She is an arm length's away. "Now!" I yell.

Esther looks up and sees four boys flying at her. She tries to run but Stan tackles her to the ground before she can get far.

"Stay away from me!" she screams. "Get off!"

Her screams do her no good. By the time the four boys stop punching, kicking, and whacking her with crutches, she is barely conscious.

I place the recording by her head. The four of us then quickly run off.

Later that night, the surveillance team informs us that the girls did indeed get the tape. Red found it around two hours later when she was walking down Esther's street.

**Bebe P.O.V.**

"I call to order this emergency session of South Park Girl Congress. This afternoon, at approximately 15:00 hours, one of our members was viciously attacked. She was found by our treasurer about two hours later. At the scene of this heinous crime, a video recording was found. This tape is a message left by the attackers. I am going to show you this message."

I click a button at my podium and the far wall swings around, revealing a large TV. I click another button and the tape begins to play.

There are three people on the screen. Cartman is standing in the center. To his left is Stan and to his right is Clyde. Above their heads is a banner that has the letters G.R.O.S.S. and some sort of emblem. Cartman begins to speak.

"Greetings South Park Girl Congress. Yes, we do know about you. Now, I'm sure you're all wondering why we beat up Esther. You see, we know that you have some things that we want. We demand that you give us those things that we want. If we do not get our way, we will harm another one of your members. But next time, it will be more severe. Now, on to the three things we want. Number one: we want access to the money that you have. Yes, we know you have some. Number two: we want all of the contents of your weaponry. Finally, we demand that Wendy drops out of the election. We will not let you have control of the school. If you are ready to hand things over, meet by the basketball courts during recess. And remember, it's best for you if you just hand what we want over."

The tape ended. The room is dead silent until Heidi speaks up.

"I think that it would be best to give them what they want."

"I will not allow that. We can't let them have our stuff and I have done too much to just quit on the campaign!" Wendy responds.

"I agree with Wendy. I will not just hand over our assets to them, and we need to have control in the school!" Red replies.

"I also agree. Let's put it to vote. Does not giving them what they want sparkle with everyone?" I ask.

The response is an almost unanimous, "Sunshine!"

"The motion passes. This club that the boys have will not get what they want," I reply. "Also, nobody is to have any contact with any of the boys unless it is during the meeting at recess tomorrow. Meeting adjourned."

**Cartman P.O.V.**

"So why do we need to bring chloroform to school tomorrow if we don't know what the girls' response is?" Butters asks.

"Because, Butters, they are not going to give up that much over a little lost blood. Therefore, we need the chloroform in order to knock out the next girl in our plan." I respond.

It's around 8:00 and everyone else is gone. Unfortunately, Butters's parents are out of town so he has to stay with me. I'm currently just having him get stuff ready for when the girls reject the offer that we sent them.

"So what will we do when they give in?" Butters asks.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, what are we supposed to do with all of those weapons?"

I sigh. "Butters, sometimes these subhumans never give up. We will always be in a power struggle with them."

"Oh."

And with that, Butters puts the container of chloroform into his backpack and crawls into his sleeping bag for the night.

_The Next Day_

**Bebe's P.O.V.**

The girls, following orders, are staying away from the boys. Even during class, the girls all sat on one side of the classroom. The boys sat on the other.

After two hours of learning about which season of American Idol was the best, the bell for recess finally rings.

We all stick together as we walk over to the basketball courts. Cartman is already there when we arrive, along with sixteen other boys.

"You're stupid if you think that we're going to give you what you want. And, to counter your threat, we will be giving each of our members extra protection," I said to the fat boy. "And what kind of name is G.R.O.S.S.?"

"It stands for Getting Rid Of Stupid Subhumans. You girls are just stupid subhumans. And I knew that you wouldn't give up yet. That's why I made this for you," Cartman said while handing me another tape. "Let's see if you'll reconsider your choice.

"What are you talking about?" I ask him. All he does is point at the school. I follow his finger and look at the roof.

Just in time to see an unconscious Jenny Simon being thrown off by Damien and Pip.


	3. Chapter 3: First Casualty

**Updates should be a bit faster than this. Remember, I do not share any sexist or racist views in this story. And, I don't own South Park. :( R+R!**

**Bebe P.O.V.**

"Well, I'm guessing Jenny Simon is a bit too familiar with the school's roof."

As soon as we got out of school, we all gathered for an emergency Girl Congress session. Almost all of the girls were scared after seeing what happened to Jenny. She was still alive, but after the ambulance had left, there was still a gruesome blood stain on the pavement where she had landed.

"Now, I'm hoping you will reconsider your choice. Jenny Simon was very lucky today. The next person may not be. You have until 5:00 tomorrow night to give us what we want. If you are going to agree to our terms, meet us at Main Street. I strongly suggest that you do."

I turn off the tape and let Cartman's words sink in. After a few silent moments, I speak up.

"To respond to the boys' threats, I am ordering that one girl is never by herself. You are hereby ordered to always be with someone else until further notice."

"But they won't give up!" Annie Faulk cried out. "You know how Cartman is. He'll just see it as a good opportunity to take two of us out at once!" Several of the other girls nod in agreement.

"This is non-negotiable!" I shout. "They can't get to us easily if we are in groups. This is final." I can tell that they mostly don't like my decision. However, it's for the best. I hope.

As the girls begin to leave, I call Milly over to the side.

"Look, we can't let anything happen at this meeting on Main Street like what happened at school today. During the meeting, I want you to be in the Book Depository. You are our best girl with the weapons. If anything goes wrong, take a shot on Cartman."

She simply nods and mumbles, "Okay."

As she walks out the door, I shout, "And don't forget to take someone with you!"  
**Cartman P.O.V.**

"Alright people, we are near a victory. By the end of this week, Operation Tranquility Restoration will go down in the club books as a success. After this third attack, the girls will give us what we want!"

"How do you know that the targets will be there?" Kyle asked, being a skeptic like usual.

"The same way I knew that you guys would warn Scott Tenorman about the pony. I just know that it will happen. And because I know that, I know that they are going to give up soon," I explain. "Craig, do you have the kerosene yet?"

"No, but it's on its way," Craig responds in his monotone.

"Well Jesus Christ, hurry up with it! Hey, don't flip me off Craig! Anyways, by Wednesday, the girls will be begging us for mercy."

_The Next Day_

"Alright Kyle, it's up to you and Butters. Show 'em what you got! Oh, and make sure to use all of the kerosene!"

I send Kyle on his way to deal with the next hit. Meanwhile, Stan, Clyde and I have a meeting to attend.

**Bebe P.O.V.**

I arrive at Main Street several minutes before five. Along with me is Wendy and Red, the Congress's second and third in command.

I look around to see if Cartman has arrived yet. He hasn't. I pull out a walkie talkie and hit a button.

"Commander to Shooter, repeat, Commander to Shooter, do you read, over. _Krrrk._

"I read, over. _Krrrk._

"Are you in position, over. _Krrrk._

"Yes indeed. Lola and I are here, over. _Krrrk._

"If you sense anything wrong, take the shot, over and out. _Krrrk._

I put the walkie talkie away. Just in time, too. Cartman and two others are approaching.

**Cartman P.O.V.**

Bebe's here first, I see. Just as I expected. I quickly send a text to Kyle, telling him to go in. I can see him and Butters crossing the street behind Bebe and going into the Book Depository.

"So, I see you made it," I say to the three girls.

"If you are stupid enough to think that I will give up the election over a prank—" Wendy begins a rant but I cut her off.

"Oh, I know you won't. That's why we're taking this to the next level."

Bebe begins to reach for her pocket. I speak up again.

"The walkie talkie won't do much for you, Bebe." She stops and looks at me.

"The walkie talkie is probably the least of Milly and Lola's problems right now. When the flames reach the books, that old building will go up in seconds." The color is gone from all three of the girls' faces.

"And my guess is that the flames will be reaching those books about… right… now." As I say that last word, the Book Depository erupts into flames.  
_

Half an hour later, two vehicles leave the smoldering remains of the Book Depository. The fire engine is the first to go, followed by the coroner's truck.

**Please R+R, Smarv out!**


	4. Chapter 4: GROSS Takes This Round

**A/N: Alright, I know where this is going now, so updates should be at least weekly. R+R, Smarv out!**

**{Insert Disclaimer Here}**

**Bebe P.O.V.**

"It is time to accept that we lost. We'll just count our losses, regroup, and eventually get revenge."

Wendy was addressing the congress. She didn't want to give in to the boys' demands, but she was also smart.

"We can't risk refusing any longer. We already lost Lola and our best fighter is in the hospital. This needs to end."

Wendy finished her speech and sits down. As she sits down, I stand up and begin addressing the crowd.

"Alright, Wendy will formally announce her withdrawal from the election tomorrow at school. We will give them the money and pretend that the weapons we give them are all that we have." The girls are all looking down, admitting defeat. I continue. "However, this is not the last the boys will see from us. We will get in touch with some other nearby Girl Congresses and ask them to pool resources together for us. We will also ask them to arrange "accidents" for the members of the G.R.O.S.S. clubs in their communities. As for the election, there are always recalls. Overall, the girls will prevail!"  
I seem to have gotten the girls the girls riled up. However, like usual, we have on skeptic among us.

"What about the boys in this town? Can we do to them what they did to me?" Jenny Simon asks, still with numerous casts on. This is the first time anyone has seen her since the incident the other day.

"Directly, no, because we don't want them coming after us again. However, we do have a little surprise planned for one of them later tonight after we hand the goods over." This seems to satisfy her as she has fallen quiet once more. Either that or her pain medication kicked in.

"This battle is lost, but girls always emerge victorious. Meeting adjourned!"

**Cartman P.O.V.**

"Alright, we're about to be rich, you guys! They'll be here in a couple minutes and we'll get our stuff! I'm so excited!"

That seemed to be what everyone was feeling right now. After all, we had just won over the Girl Congress's bank account and weapon stockpiles. And we made Wendy forfeit the school election! I'm going to be school president!

Anyways, the girls agreed to meet us here on Main Street, same place and time as yesterday. Here, they were going to hand the goods over.

"Alright people, they will be here soon. Leave the talking to me."

A few minutes later, the South Park 4th grade girls are standing across from the 4th grade boys. I step forward.

"Hand it all over, Bebe."

She hands me a bank card. "The money." She hands me a key. "There is a storage facility on the east side of town. The weapons are there."

"And the election?"

"Wendy will withdraw before the vote starts tomorrow morning."

Immediately after saying that, Bebe turns around and silently walks away, not looking back. The other girls follow suit. As soon as they are out of sight, I turn around to face the other boys. "We're rich, you guys! We won!"

After a few more minutes of celebration, the boys begin going home, one by one. Eventually, Jason and I are the only two left.

"You want me to stay around any longer, or can I go?" Jason asks.

"You can leave," I tell him while looking at the remains of the Book Depository. He turns around and begins walking home.

I wouldn't find out until the next morning that he never quite made it there.

_The Next Day_

The entire school, all three hundred students, are packed into the small gymnasium for a special assembly. The noise was beginning to reach unbearable levels, but Principal Victoria put a stop to it.

"How are you all doing today children?" Principal Victoria says into the microphone, silencing everyone. "Now, as most of you know, we are all here today for the school president elections. However, before we begin, I would like to hold a moment of silence for our classmate Jason, who was hit by a car last night. Let's all keep him in our prayers."

This piece of news startled me. I immediately look around for Bebe. I see her a few rows ahead, but she appears to be just as surprised as I am. Well, she must just not be the cause then.

"Now, on to the elections. Wendy, you may now use this time to make your final speech."

Finally! The part that I have been waiting for! I start squirming in anticipation as she takes the mic.

"I concede. Cartman wins," Wendy says bluntly and sits back down. Principal Victoria, looking confused, takes the microphone back.

"Okay, well, I suppose Eric wins the election. You may now go back to class."

"YES!"

**Bebe P.O.V.**

After Wendy's concession, the day was altogether uneventful. Despite Wendy's loss, however, my day was looking pretty good.

The North Park girls had done their job and gotten Jason severely injured, and Cartman has no idea that I'm behind it.

The Orange County girls helped find more weapons to replace the ones the boys now have.  
And, just to top it all off, the Seattle girls, among the richest Girl Congresses in the country, had set up a new account for us.

All of this, plus the dozens of reports of boys have unfortunate "accidents" nationwide, equals a good day in my book.

G.R.O.S.S. may have won that last round, but the next is going to the Girl Congresses of America.


	5. Chapter 5: Important Visit

**Hello! Disclaimer: I (sigh) do not own South Park or anything else referenced in here. R+R!**

**Cartman P.O.V.**

God dang it! I should have expected this. Right after our glorious victory, Jason has to go and get hit by some shitty driver. So now, instead of spending some quality time with all my new money, we have to go and visit him at Hell's Pass!

"Hey, fatass, I'm talking to you!"

I look up and see Kyle looking at me. Huh, I must have zoned out there. "What, Jew?"

"We're almost there," he replied. He turned his back to me.  
Stan's mom had insisted that we go visit him, but she was busy, so we had to ride in Stan's Uncle Jimbo's truck. And since there were only enough seats for Jimbo and Ned in the truck, the four of us had to sit in the back. And let me tell you, that is not comfortable, especially with all of the bumps on the steep road.

Anyways, it looks like Kyle was right. I could see the silhouette of the hospital at the top of the mountain. We'd be there in five minutes, tops.

"Alright, you kids take as much time as you like. Ned and I are going to look for some endangered mountain dolphins. And we're bringing our guns in case those cute, innocent creatures attacked us," Jimbo shouted out to us.

We all rolled our will probably mark the day where those two cause an eighth species to go extinct.

We arrived at the hospital. We all got out and, while the four of us went inside, Jimbo and Ned headed into the woods with their guns.

We walked up to a receptionist desk. "Could you tell us what floor our friend Jason is on?" Kyle asked to receptionist.

"Jason who?" she replied.

"Um…"

We all looked at each other. How did we not know his last name after four years?

"Well, we don't know," Kyle said.

"What is he in here for?"

"Mf mhf mph mn m mfh mgpf," Kenny answered.

"What did he say?" the receptionist asked.

"He said that he was hit by a car," Stan said.

"Oh, yes, that Jason. Second floor, room 23. Visiting hours end at eight."

We left the desk without another word and head for upstairs.

"Let's get this over with as soon as possible," I say.

"You know, for how good you did with the girls this work, you really are a shitty person," Kyle replies. "I mean, he got hit by a car!"

"Oh yeah? Well at least I'm not a sneaky Jew! You only joined the club for the money!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"Guys, shut up! We're here!" Stan says, jumping into our argument before things get worse.

As we enter the room, the doctor is leaving. "Are you boys here to see him?" the doctor asks.

"Yes," I reply.

"He just woke up, but he's still in pretty bad shape. Do make sure to be gentle, okay?"

"Okay." The doctor walks away. The four of us walk over to his bed. "You awake, Jason?" I ask.

"Of course he is, the doctor just said that, fatass!" Kyle says.

"Shush!" Stan says, once again ending our argument. "So, how are you doing, Jason?"

"Ow. Alright, considering I got hit by a speeding car. The doctors have me on pain killers, though."

"Oh, well, we hope you get better soon. Everyone at school is rooting for you," Kyle replied.

On and on it went. For the next half hour, I stood there while Kyle, Stan, and Kenny talked about how much everyone misses him and hoped that he got better. I was thankful when a nurse finally stepped in the middle of their conversation.

"Boys, it's just about eight o'clock, so if you wouldn't mind wrapping this up soon, we would appreciate it. Jason needs his rest," she said.

We all said our goodbyes one by one and left. I said bye last and, while walking out the door, Jason acknowledged my existence for the first during the visit.  
"Eric!"

"What do you want?" I asked, walking back to them.

"I need to tell you something, but I didn't want them to hear. I knew that it needed to be you that I told."

I glance at the door to make sure that the other three were gone before turning back. "What is it?"

Jason sits up in bed, wincing in pain. He leans in close to me and starts whispering.

"The other night, when I got hit by the car, I saw the driver. It was a girl. She looked like she was from North Park."

"So?"

"The thing is, she definitely wasn't sixteen. She was our age. Also, when I was lying in the middle of the road, the last thing I remember seeing was a blonde girl in a red shirt watching me from an alley."

"Jason, are you absolutely certain?" I asked. If what he was saying was true, the girls may still be fighting.

"She looked too much like Bebe for it to be a coincidence."

"Okay, thanks for telling me that. I'll try to see what I can do." I stood up and left.

I caught up to the others in the parking lot. "Where have you been?" Stan asked. We've been waiting for you for, like, five minutes!"

"Oh, you know, I was just saying goodbye."

The car ride back to South Park was uneventful. Well, besides having to sit in the back of a truck with a bunch of dead dolphin-like things. When we got back, I was jumping out of the truck towards my house before it even stopped. I went into my house without even thanking Jimbo for the ride.

"Hello? Anybody home?" I shout. No answer. Good, that means no one will be bothering me.

I walk upstairs and pull out my laptop. I turn it on and close the shades while it's loading. I can't risk any of the girls watching what I'm doing.

I log on and open the internet browser. I go onto the South Park police website and find the traffic camera photos. They're password protected, but Barbrady never changed the passcode from the original one- SouthParkPolice. Now, time to see if we do indeed have a problem.

I start browsing through the photo files. Alright, the meeting took place at five o'clock last night. We had gotten the stuff right away and the girls had all left five minutes later. We then celebrated on Main Street for another five minutes before people started leaving. Jason was the last to leave, at about 5:20. He was run over at the intersection of Main Street and Golden Cow Avenue. It would have taken him about eight minutes to reach the intersection. For the car to cause those injuries, it had to be going at about 60mph. It probably would have kept a constant speed, meaning that it would arrive at the City Hall traffic camera just in time for the minutely picture at… 5:31!

I click on the 5:31 picture. Sure enough, there was a car. The picture's angle was excellent as well. I could see the driver fully.

Jason was right. She was about my age, give or take a year. She was also wearing a North Park Bulls t-shirt.

Bebe must be involved somehow. Nine year old girls don't conveniently run over someone who just profited at the expense of other girls.

On a whim, I decide to go to the G.R.O.S.S. website. I'm not the club's founder- it's actually a nationwide club founded by someone in Ohio. Most U.S. cities have G.R.O.S.S. divisions.

I don't go on the website often. Members usually just go on to report various successes and projects. Today, however, the posts were not like the usual.

In various cities nationwide, people were reporting G.R.O.S.S. members being attacked by girls. New York even reported a casualty.

The list of cities easily reached more than fifty in number. San Francisco, Boston, Milwaukee, Atlanta, Dallas. The list just went on. I scrolled down, reading the posts.

One post, however caught my attention.

_Posted Today at 12:48 P.M._

_Denver G.R.O.S.S. attacked by girls! Left many wounded and one dead. They shouted that they were doing it for the South Park Girls. How can we get back at them?_

I stared at the screen for several minutes. I had confirmed it. The girls had not given up. Knowing that it would be best to not fight back at us, they lashed out at other divisions of the club. They thought that they could get away with this.

But they made one fatal mistake.  
They forgot who they are dealing with. I am Eric fucking Cartman. Nobody gets the last laugh over me. If they want a fight, then they're in for one hell of one.

I start typing.

**Alright, I know, it's a pretty boring chapter. But it's important. The plot will start rising soon, so stay tuned and expect an update in the next few days. Please review, and Smarv out!**


	6. Chapter 6: Meetings

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Cartman P.O.V.**

"Why are we here, Cartman? We already won. We got our money. Can't we just sit back and relax for a while?"

Once again, I have everyone gathered in my basement for an important G.R.O.S.S. meeting. And once again, Kyle is asking a bunch of questions right off the bat.

"Wow Kyle, I must say that I'm surprised. A Jew, requesting to sit back and stop making money for a while. You've come so far," I say, pretending to wipe a tear from my eye. "Anyways, we are not done. As a matter of fact, we are very far from being done," I respond.

All of the members of the South Park division of G.R.O.S.S., minus Jason, are looking at me with confused looks on their faces.

"What the hell are you talking about Cartman?" Token asks

"My, my, aren't we all a bit impatient today. Anyways, we're not out of the clear with the girls quite yet. You see, our friend Jason has been in the hospital for the past week due to him being hit by a speeding car. Last night, he went into cardiac arrest."

This is apparently new news to everyone, seeing as how they immediately start talking amongst each other. I start speaking louder so that I can be heard over them.

"The doctors were able to revive him. However, they are unsure on whether he will live through tonight or not."

"Sorry for interrupting, but what does this have to do with why we're here, Eric?" Butters asks nervously.

"I swear to God, the next person to interrupt me will be cut to pieces and left out for the birds!" I shout. Butters sits back down, wide-eyed and scared. I continue.

"As I was about to say, there is a huge reason why Jason's incident is related to our skirmish with the girls. And that, of course, is because the girls caused Jason's incident."

Once again, everyone starts talking and asking questions.

"Where is this information coming from?" Stan asks.

"Testimony and evidence. Do you remember last week when we visited Jason? Remember when I stayed behind for a few minutes after you guys left?"

"Yeah," Stan replies.

"Well, I wasn't saying goodbye like I told you. Jason had to tell me something. He said," I pause for dramatic effect. "that the guy who hit him was around our age. And that the guy was actually a girl."

"So? It could be any girl. How do you know that it was because of the South Park girls?" Clyde asks while unwrapping another taco.

"That's what I originally thought. But then he told me that while he lay on the ground, he saw a girl watching him from an alley. A girl that looked like Bebe.

"Now, naturally, I then went home to confirm this information. After some digging, I came across a picture that proved that a North Park girl, around our age, ran over Jason."

"Still doesn't prove anything," Scott Malkinson said.

"Ay! I was getting there! Don't forget what I said about the birds! Anyways, this was too much to be a coincidence. Just think about it. Minutes after the girls lose so much to us, one of our own is hit by a speeding car driven by a nine year old girl with another girl looking like Bebe seen nearby. I think that pretty much confirms it."

"Yu…yu…yeah, I guess that d-does make s…s…sense, Eric," Jimmy says.

"Timmeh!"

"I'm getting there, Timmy. Anyways, after checking this information, I went onto the G.R.O.S.S. website. And on that website, I saw something that should be causing us much concern.

"Last week, after we thought that the fight with the girls had ended, girls from over fifty cities nationwide attacked their corresponding G.R.O.S.S. clubs. Hundreds of injuries and two casualties were reported."

There is a collective gasp from the boys in front of me. I continue onward.

"One city, Denver, reported that during the attack, the girls said that they were doing it 'for the South Park girls'. The girls know that they can't fight us head-on, so they are taking it all out on boys nationwide. However, they made two mistakes. One: they let us know that they haven't given up and that they are still fighting. Two: we now know that this 'Girl Congress' is nationwide, just like G.R.O.S.S."

"Well what are we going to do? I mean, we can't just leave everyone to themselves. We have to do something!" Stan said.

"I've already taken care of that. I posted on the website about our victory. I told them that they could get back by doing what we did."

"Any word back yet?" Token asked.

"Most of the attacked cities have reported that they succeeded."

"So what do we do now?" Francis said, speaking out for the first time in about three years.

"We wait. You see, if we already know about G.R.O.S.S.'s victory, then the girls are sure to know about their loss. They could strike back at any given time on any given day. We need to be careful. We need to keep ourselves safe. And that, of course, is why we are all staying at Token's house this weekend. Strength in numbers. See you there!"

"Wait, what?!" Token asked. This was the first he had heard of this plan.

"Meeting adjourned!" I shouted.

**Bebe P.O.V.**

"Why are we here, Bebe?" Esther asked.

I had called for an emergency meeting of South Park Girls Congress. However, this wasn't the average emergency meeting. That is why all of the 4th grade girls are standing at the edge of the woods at the northern edge of South Park.

"Why can't we just meet at the usual place? Why do we have to come out to the woods?" Heidi asks. Oh, how little they know.

"Girls, this is a special meeting," I say to the crowd. "One that we can't use the normal place for. Observe." I walk over to a nearby tree and place my hand into a small hole in it.

I glance at the girls. They all have confused looks on their faces. They probably think I'm crazy. Well, they're in for a surprise. I press a button.

A metal grate nearby flips open, revealing a ladder. The girls are wary of it, but I hop right in. They eventually follow suit.

One by one, they all got down to the bottom and stared in awe at the room we were in.

"Welcome to Windstone Institute."

"Named after the girl who found the money to sponsor it this one. Every city's Girl Congress has some type of base. This one, however, is among the finest in the country."

The girls were looking in awe at the room. It was basically the same as our other room on the surface, except for three things. It had many more screens on the far wall than the one in our other room. And it was much bigger. And fancier.

"Construction started in 1972, but it wasn't finished until 1985. But it makes sense if you think about it. With 75 floors, it's basically an underground JPMorgan Chase Tower. And it had to be built in secret."

"Seventy-five floors? How did they do this?" Wendy asked.

"Well, remember that Windstone girl I was talking about? Her parents were very good conmen, and they passed some of their tricks to her. She managed to trick the Chinese government into funding it. Anyways, it's about time we start. Everyone, take a seat."

The girls walk towards the sets, slowly at first, but once they realize that it's the same setup as the surface room, they sit down.

I click a button at my podium and, one by one, the screens all begin to come to life. Each screen has a city label and shows that city's Girl Congress.

"You see girls, the South Park Girls Congress is one of the most prominent congresses in the country. We are elite!" I tell the girls. "Now, down to business." I click another button, turning on the audio.

The head of the Dallas committee speaks first. "The boys have responded to our attacks. They blackmailed us, just like they blackmailed you!"

"Yeah! Us too!" a girl from Chicago shouts. "They left with over 50,000 dollars!"

They screens erupt with girls shouting about the retaliation from the boys in their cities.

"QUIET!" I yell into the mic. The girls fall silent. "We need to handle this calmly. However, we won't let that stop us from using whatever means necessary against the boys. The boys have gone too far this time. If they want war, then by God they'll get it! You see, if we just retaliate back, they'll keep coming back. Therefore, we need to step it up. We've seen how fighting ended up for us. The time for fighting is over. It is the time for dominating! So, on this day, I hereby declare myself the director of Protocol 9!"

"Protocol 9?" the girl from Phoenix asks. "Is that really necessary?"

"Yes," I answer. "It is."

"If there is anyone who objects to the execution of Protocol 9, do say so at this time," the Washington D.C. girl says.

The room, and all of the screens, are silent.

**There should be an update in the next week-ish. R+R, Smarv out!**


	7. Chapter 7: Epic Party

**Sorry for the late update, but I've been VERY busy. Enjoy and please R+R! Disclaimer: I (sadly) own nothing.**

**Cartman P.O.V.**

"Hey, Token, where's the soda at?" I shout to the African American boy, trying to be heard over the loud music from the other room. There is a great party in the next room, but for some reason this kid is just sitting alone in here.

"I hate you so much, Cartman," he replied.

"And I love you too. But seriousleh, were is it? I want soda. It's not a party without soda!"

"This isn't even supposed to be a party, Cartman! You just went ahead and invited sixteen other people to my house for the weekend!" Token shouted at me.

That was true. I had given an order that the South Park G.R.O.S.S. stay at Token's house for the weekend. And the reason for the order was so that we could all be kept safe. But that doesn't mean we have to be bored the whole time!

It was Friday night, and all sixteen of the previously mentioned boys were living it up at the Black's mansion. There was music, pizza, movies, and a bunch of other awesome things.

"Seriously, if my parents find out about this, they will be extremely pissed at me!" Token shouted.

"Come on dude, just relax. Your parents won't be back home until Monday. You don't have to worry about getting caught until then!"

"No, Cartman, I don't want to get caught at all. You see, having everyone here for our own protection is one thing, but throwing a party is a whole other ballpark! You are going to help me clean this up after everyone leaves Sunday night. You got that?" Token asks.

I sigh. "Yeah, fine. But come on, don't be that kid who damages the atmosphere at a party! Relax, have some fun!" I was giving him some good lifelong advice. This kid needs to learn to let loose and have some fun!

He appears to have taken my advice because he follows me into the other room. He grabs a piece of pizza from the box on the table and pulls out some twelve packs of soda from a cabinet. I knew I should have looked there!

The rest of the night was just about as awesome as it could possibly get. We played video games, played in Token's indoor laser tag arena, and had a huge bonfire in the fire pit in the backyard. Then, to finish everything off, we decided to watch a movie. After much debate, we eventually all agreed on watching Terrance and Philip: Asses of Fire. (Half of us wanted to watch that while the other half wanted to watch Terrance and Philip in Not Without My Anus. The side I was on prevailed.) The movie was as good as when we watched it for the first time.

"Oh God, last night was so totally AWESOME!" I said. People were just starting to wake up and make their way from the party room to the kitchen. And as every person made that short trek, the memories of the night before would come back to them. Between the half eaten pizza slices, random marshmallows and s'more sticks, laser tag guns, empty soda cans, nerf bullets, and iPods spread all over the room, it was pretty clear that some awesome shit had happened the night before.

"So, what are we going to do for breakfast?" Stan asks. He has a good point. It's 8:30 on Saturday morning, and the people waking up are hungry. Token's parents don't even know that we're here, so they obviously didn't leave behind something for us to eat.

"I think we should just call Pete's Donut Shoppe. They have the best cream filled doughnuts in town. Plus, I know their number by heart, so that way we don't have to look one up," I respond.

"Of course you do," Kyle mutters under his breath.

"Hey, you shut up, Jew!" I shout while punching in the phone number. The store picks up after the second ring.

"Hello, this is Pete's Donut Shoppe, thanks for calling! How can I help you today, sir?"

"I would like, hmm, let's see, nine cream filled doughnuts and nine long-johns." I look at Stan and Kyle. "What do you want me to get you guys?"

"Um, Cartman? I think you need to see this," Stan says to me.

"Can it wait? I still have five doughnuts to go!" I respond. All eighteen of us are crammed into Token's kitchen eating doughnuts for breakfast. Stan is sitting at the dining room table with his laptop.

"No. You should see this."  
I put down my doughnut and walk over to him, sighing. "What is so important that I had to stop eating my doughnut?"

"This. It's the camera we planted in the Girl Congress meeting room," Stan answers. I look at the screen. The room is empty, but one thing is different. On the far wall, something has been written in black paint.

"What does that say?" I ask.

"It says, 'Turn on the news, Cartman'."

"Uh-oh. Token, turn on the news!" I shout.

"Why? What's up?" he asks.

"Just do it!" Sensing the urgency in my voice, he runs over to the nearest TV and turns it on to CNN. On the bottom of the screen, there is a breaking news banner. Token turns up the sound and we listen to the reporter.

"We are here at the Pentagon, Tom, where it is believed that a group of nine-year-old girls have broken into an area of the Pentagon referred to as "Sector Two". Now, the Pentagon is telling us that this is where a top secret project is kept. This is why they are not releasing the footage from the camera in that area to us. However, they are telling us that this camera shows these girls taking only pictures and transcripts. The Pentagon is saying that the stolen transcripts contain a full report of everything that happened in Sector Two between the dates of October 24th, 2007, and October 31st, 2007. This is all we know right now. We will report new information as we get it. Back to you, Tom."

I shut off the TV. "What the hell are the girls doing with the Doorway to the Imagination?"

**A.N. Point of Information- The above dates are the dates where Imagionationland Parts Two and Three aired- the two episodes where Doorway to the Imagination was mentioned. R+R, Smarv out!**


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